Can We Claim Our Wholeness?
By Raven Cohan
In 1979, I had a quantum healing of my vision. I had worn glasses and contact lenses since I was ten years old for near-sightedness. I woke up one morning to take my dog out. I saw every detail of the beautiful scenery in Acapulco, where I was working at that time. I thought I’d accidentally left on my lenses all night, but when I checked, it was my naked eyes that could see!
A fear came over me that, since I was taking a bus to town that morning, I might return to my “normal” poor vision while I was in town, and have to go searching for a clean place to put on my lenses. At thirty-three, I didn’t even own glasses. Feeling so frightened of my perceived limitations of vision caused me to put my lenses on before leaving for town. I “looked a gift horse in the mouth !”
God/Tao tried to give me the gift of clear sight again two weeks later! It is sad to have to admit that the same fear over took me. I was too afraid to risk letting go of the control I had by seeing through those plastic lenses. It was as if I hadn’t believed what had happened was possible. In my fear, disbelief, and lack of consciousness, I opted to turn down the miracle of having had perfect vision restored to me.
This true story shows to me how in denial I was about accepting my wholeness. I wasn’t then aware enough to know what the over all lesson was, which has helped me to evolve as a human being. Having first-handedly felt such fear of being HEALED, helps me to understand similar reactions I see so often in my students when they begin getting in touch with their own healing energy. There are many people who experience strong healing in their lessons of Tai Chi, Chi Kung, Chinese Meditation or other classes in yoga or meditation that they may take. We all think that we would bravely take the healings with open arms. We think we would throw down our metaphorical crutches and shout, “Hallelujah! I’m healed!”...(or I’m on the road to healing!) What I have observed is that it is not so simple.
Few people get a dramatic and spontaneous healing such as I have related here. What most people do experience is the Hering's “Law of Cure”* , which is when people re-experience symptoms that surface from past illnesses or injuries. Some people feel dizzy, nauseated, excessively sweaty, and find themselves giving off an odor that is beyond a failure of their deodorants. Some of these examples and more happen during the class while others come about hours or days after the class. I alert new students of mine about these possibilities in a hand out they receive. A symptom of an old or latent illness reappearing is very often a sign that healing is taking place. Yet, who likes to open old wounds? Sometimes it isn’t even physical stuff that comes up. Often it is emotional or mental. Some students get agitated or angry or sad or plainly fearful. The fear that arises is a defense that keeps us from confronting our whole selves.
The question that we must ask ourselves is do we really want to get healed? This is a very deep subject. For some people it is not easily approachable. I have no one simple answer to this, for every individual will take as long as it takes to give up old, comfortable ways that keep us clinging to symptoms that come from deeply ingrained imbalances in our systems. Many people are not willing to go through healing crises even if it is explained to them that this is often necessary in order to be symptom free. The dis-eases that we harbor inside us that are ready or are waiting to be expressed as illnesses can very often be nipped in the bud with a conscious way of letting go. It is a good beginning to start recognizing how fearful and in denial we might be when we are getting close to claiming wellness. This statement is not intended to bring on “New Age Guilt syndrome.”
Let us affirm that we will keep walking forward on the path of our healing. Let us not hide in fear of our wholeness. Let us be brave and let go of the insidious need to be less than we can be. Let us heal.